Showing posts with label right wrong. Show all posts

come-as-you-are  

Posted by Zimmerman Stein in , , , , , , , , , , , ,

acceptance is not about fairness.

acceptance is %100 responsibility.
acceptance does not judge.
acceptance means absolutely no opinions about another:
what comes up for me - this thing you do - the way you are - you know how you are - it's not bad, it's just something you do - i know you better than you know yourself - are you being authentic - i sense some dishonesty - i believe this - why would you do that - you should do this - you shouldn't be that way - anyone would feel like i do - i need to stand up for myself - you're taking advantage of me - you're not being fair - you're controlling - i feel manipulated - i need to be free - you don't let me be myself - i need to express myself - you make me feel this way - you need to change - you're not hearing me - you dont listen - i cant communicate with you - you need to take responsibility

0 comments »

feel the feelings  

Posted by Zimmerman Stein in , , , , , , , , , ,


"the easiest way to deal with feelings infected with guilt has been to deny the feelings. for many of us this has been crucial to maintaining self-esteem and keeping our optimism high enough to go on with life. the problem with this is that denied feelings don't go away, they submerge and stay unconscious. this creates an opening for the split off parts of us (that experienced the feelings and are now unconscious) to repeat destructive or unwanted patterns of behavior.

denial is only a coping mechanism. real healing can come only when the feelings are felt and the guilt is confronted and removed. although the suggested practice that follows is very easy to do, it can facilitate very deep healing..."

1. "I release the judgment that I must hate myself because I ____"
2. "I release the judgment that I am bad because I ____"
3. "I release the judgment that ____ is bad or wrong."
4. "I release the judgment that I am in fact ____"

we're all innocent.


0 comments »

helping my friends does not include judging them  

Posted by Zimmerman Stein in , , , , , , , , , , , ,

i notice that when someone asks for help i do two things:

1. i praise them and help them connect to the work they're doing. i help them find joy and strength by acknowledging their deep commitment to growing and being authentic. i affirm life as i see it.
2. i put my long held judgments into the conversation. my opinions find a place. i express my buried feelings or judgments in a seemingly helpful way. i judge, make right and wrong, the people i'm committed to help.

0 comments »

unconditional love is a healthy mind  

Posted by Zimmerman Stein in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

taking things personally is the opposite of unconditional love.


i want to be loved unconditionally.


acceptance is non-attachment.


letting go means letting go of all attachment - not just letting go of hurt and anger and negatives, but also positives like hope and desire and passion and love itself.


unconditional love is exactly how i would like to be treated.


taking responsibility means anytime that i judge, every time! that i judge, i take responsibility for it.


don't ask others to clean up their act or be better friends. and if i do, then take responsibility. watch for this when feeling hurt or angry or judgmental.


i can ask for time to express my feelings or i can even ask to express my judgments. but expecting it as a right, demanding it, is blame (guilt turned outward against the people that i love).


all expectation is a form of attachment.


all taking things personally, all getting hurt is a form of attachment.


all right and wrong (judgment) is a form of attachment.


there is no love in attachment.


non-violence is complete surrender and total acceptance.


0 comments »

when i feel hurt or angry  

Posted by Zimmerman Stein in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

when I feel absolutely right and justified in my anger or hurt.
when I feel driven to be heard.
when I don't see choices anymore.
that's the time when I need to have compassion.
that's when I need to listen.
that's when I need to put myself in the other person's place.
because that's when I hurt someone's feelings or hear their feelings.
that's when I try to force someone to listen or listen to them.
that's when I demand that someone change or accept them and get to know them better.
that's when I try to take away someone's freedom or support their happiness.
when I feel hurt or angry.

that's when I can choose to show the love in my heart.
that's when I can choose to be compassionate.

the struggle for power and control has dominated my heart and betrayed love for the last time.

0 comments »

judgment release  

Posted by Zimmerman Stein in , , ,

1. "I release the judgment that I must hate myself because I ____"
2. "I release the judgment that I am bad because I ____"
3. "I release the judgment that ____ is bad or wrong."
4. "I release the judgment that I am in fact ____"


The effects of judgment release are often subtle at first, but always cumulative.

0 comments »
Older Posts >>